Please don’t ignore physical or psychological abuse
I would like to add that even in their ‘drug-induced rage’, they know where to draw the line as far as their mothers, sisters, and other family members are concerned. The victims are always wives and girlfriends. Sometimes and sometimes not. There were cases recently of men attacking their mothers and sisters (like the two brothers in Peshawar) which only came to the limelight because someone recorded it. This kind of mindset just looks at women as inferior beings.
I speak from personal experience I got addicted to abuse and went through solitude therapy through traveling, living alone made me stronger. On the other hand I am thankful to my abuser for making me strong enough and the woman I am today I wouldn’t have been. Life experiences taught me to stand up for myself and be vocal. I make my own choices and I’m the decision maker of my life, this needs to be understood by all. Life is beautiful!
Not to be named
Very sad and pathetic to learn about these murders. What boggles one’s mind is why the hell would educated ladies tolerate such behaviors even so that there is abundant awareness available at least for the educated class. Moreover, I was discussing with someone how these educated women with so much exposure fall for such men. The first moment it happens, get the hell out. Doesn’t matter if it’s a marriage or a relationship. Get out. Doesn’t matter how many years you’ve been in it or how many times he’s apologized.
Should Abuse also be reported to the police?
There is no honor in tolerating abuse and no dignity in covering it up. Get out and any idiot who comes to counsel you to stay in that messed up a relationship because of social pressure etc, distance yourself from that person too. The law isn’t going to save your hide, sadly, as we have a social tolerance for domestic abuse. Act in self-defense, and act when the first red flag shows up. Don’t become another news item. I have female friends who have stayed or are in abusive relationships – Get. Out. It can happen to any woman from any background, education, or financial means, and be done by any man, regardless of his social standing or education. Your life is more important. Get out.
A lot of it has to do with a lack of consequences and accountability. Had Zahir Jaffer of Adamjee Insurance not been mollycoddled by the system and properly incarcerated instead of a half-hearted attempt of putting him in a hospital while continuing his supply of luxury chocolates and colognes, Shahnawaz and his parents might have acted a tad bit more responsibly. I know men who wouldn’t raise their voices, let alone fists at women, as accountability has been ingrained in them since childhood. They know their parents will break their legs before they get a chance to mistreat someone’s daughter.
