There is an ongoing meme that more than half the time newlywed couple is desirous of having a child within the first year to proclaim to their extended family that they are well, healthy, and without any “defects”.
God bestowed me with the great news of the birth of my first son on the eve of 12th Rabi ul Awwal.
First I would like to thank Allah and the boys played really well. May Allah make him “Saleh” and provide the happiness of offspring to those without heirs. It is a deprivation that only a child can fulfill.
For concerned parents, we have seen there are a lot many mommy blogs. But what is it that fathers need to know before the birth of their firstborn?
A. Pray and Plan
Plan your child’s birth in accordance with the rules of Shariah. Once you decide to produce, pray a lot. Just not be sexually attracted towards your partner but also be kind towards her. The lesser stress she has, the quicker the chances of conceiving. A lot of the time parents do not talk about aphrodisiacs, but eating healthy and doing sports or any sort of exercise will do. Naturally, good aphrodisiac foods include dates and cardamom. Every time you have intercourse with your partner do a dua together and as always leave the rest to ALLAH. The appetite and sleep patterns may differ but the mood swings will be easier than PMsing days in anticipation of the good days.
B. Know the Physiology
There is just not the vagina. There is a cervix, there is a placenta. How do I know that? What are cramps? What is an amniotic sac? What are Brixton’s hicks? What is the station after engagement with the cervix? How often do the cramps occur? What are contractions? What does it feel like to your partner during the contractions? What is dilation? How dilated should it be before the final push? There are a lot of doula services that enable you to know the physiology and the kind of stakes involved during the pregnancy. To be honest, if it was not for the sake of Amani Birth, it would have been so confusing to check out all the content available on Youtube which makes the experience more complex.
